Vibrator Orders You a Pizza Once You’re Finished

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  • Oh boy. How to write about this story and remain a gentleman? Oh boy. Let me think. You know how after you masturbate with a vibrator you want to eat a whole pizza? Well, CamSoda, that lovable pornographic company kind of known for its ridiculous stunts, has done it again by releasing a vibrator that, once you’re finished, with the push of a button, can order a Domino’s Pizza. Humanity’s two greatest pleasures: sex, and specifically, Domino’s.

    The vibrator is called the RubGrub and works sort of like an Amazon Dash Button. CamSoda’s CEO Daryn Parker said this about his bold new invention worthy of every weird hedonist and big pizza fan —

    Masturbation, while ultimately enjoyable, can be a strenuous physical activity during which an individual exerts a lot of energy and burns many calories. Inevitably, once someone has climaxed, they feel lethargic and hungry. Now, in order to enjoy your Saturday night, all you need is your RubGrub device. Get off and get stuffed, all with the quick click of a button.

    I never thought I would hear a porn CEO talk about the downsides of masturbation, but here we are.

    Ultimately, it feels like the one goal is to get me to write “CamSoda” a bunch of times and guess what folks, they did it. By recreating that Seinfeld episode where George tries to eat pastrami during sex, they have got me to write their darned company’s name!

    Daryn says that he thinks many pizza companies will buy into this — not just Domino’s— once they see how popular it is, but apparently other pizza chains want you to buy their pizzas after you finish masturbating? Although a Domino’s official claims they had nothing to do with this so—

    Anyway, what do you think? Is this something you would want in your home? Let us know in the comments or on Twitter at @WhatsTrending.

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