Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson Would Like You to Know He Goes Down on His Wife

Look, it’s been a rough few years for America, which is why I think we all breathed a big sigh of relief when at long last, a silly news story rolled across our desks: DJ Khaled doesn’t chow down on that puss, folks. DJ Khaled was rightfully mocked for his absolute lack of game (and how he proudly gave an interview about his absolute lack of game), and dudes all over the Internet nerdily raised their finger in the air and went “I like to eat girls out too!” One of those dorks was Smash Mouth, which was fun. One of them was Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, who in a seeming bid to “win” over the “Internet” told the world that folks — if sex was a menu, Dwayne would be going: “one oral sex, please!

Cool, cool, cool. Somehow I didn’t doubt that The Rock ate ladies out. I feel like a big part of his persona is he probably eats people out. Anyway, Smash Mouth’s Twitter account let the world know that they also eat ladies out. I don’t know if it’s one member, or all the members, or just the concept of Smash Mouth, but here’s what these guys had to say.

So, Smash Mouth? They will smash their mouth against your junk, ladies.

And that has been an update on which celebrities eat girls out and vice versa. Goodbye.

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