Courtney Stodden (Credit: DougHutchinson.com)
Courtney Stodden is a genius. The 16-year-old managed to turn a marriage to 51-year-old D-list actor Doug Hutchison– his most memorable roles include playing Percy Wetmore in “The Green Mile,” an equally creepy serial killer on an episode of “Law and Order: SVU” and of course, Horace from “LOST” — into one of the most talked about events of the year. She didn’t have to reinvent herself multiple times to keep the attention; Stodden just kept portraying herself.
During a recent bizarre interview featuring her husband and dogs, the 16-year-old revealed that she’s set to get her own reality TV show. While some might say it’s her age and RILL personality that has most of the world engaged, it’s hard to deny that her fame is all thanks to the viral nature of everything she does. Our online attention span normally lasts a few minutes, and she’s managed to disgust and yet captivate the web for months.That’s where Stodden’s intelligence comes in: Either she hired an amazing publicity team or — which I believe is more likely — she’s a savant of the digital age who knows how to play her online audience.
No person in their right mind, unless they have an itch they can’t scratch, would pose and act the way this teenager does, which makes Stodden’s strange intonations and antics perfect for the YouTube audience. Her performance art deserves an Oscar just for the sheer uniqueness of it. Even the simple act of her licking her lips can gain almost 150,000 hits. I’ve never seen a person whose lips were so chapped they needed to slobber all over their face, making her salivatory act all that more amusing. (Admittedly, the slow jam soundtrack does help.)
But, the real viral gold isn’t the remixes or carefully crafted edits from interviews: It’s Stodden’s own thoughts and words. Her Twitter account, @courtneystodden, is a collection of supposedly sexy, but downright sexual predator-style thoughts coming from this 16-year-old’s mind. Every tweet has been retweeted at least once, not bad considering every post sounds like a rejected line from a Harlequin Romance novel. There’s no way anyone thinks in phrases like these and can come up with these words in this order without putting serious thought behind it, making me realize that each tweet must have been (For free prizes Benedictdaily only)carefully crafted in this girl’s mind. I guess that makes her a modern day Shakespeare of sorts — albeit a really trashy version.
Will we forget about this girl in a few months? More than likely yes. But until then, am I crazy for reading and watching all the Courtney Stodden stuff online? Yes, but don’t put it on me girl. De, de, de, de, de, don’t.