Won’t You Be Friends With This Buffalo and His Freakish Tongue?
Unlike lions, buffaloes can’t open doors. Also unlike lions, a buffalo would never eat you. But he may lick your face with his freaky-deaky buffalo tongue.
Aww, he just wants to be friends! Who wouldn’t want to be friends with a buffalo? You could travel across the plains, riding atop his luxurious buffalo fur! They seem so docile, like giant dogs with hooves. What’s not to love?
I mean, except for that monstrous tongue. That’s a little weird.