Film Critics Agree: Just Give Leo the Oscar Before He Hurts Himself

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  • Critics are raving about Leonardo DiCaprio’s performance in “The Revenant” – and they’re starting to get really worried about him.

    In their latest parody trailer, CollegeHumor sums up the shocking lengths DiCaprio went to in the gritty, intense 2.5 hour film. “A.O. Scott says, ‘Leonardo DiCaprio delivers an Oscar-worthy performance… and if he doesn’t win, he will probably lose his fucking mind.”

    The actor has missed out on that little gold statue so many times, he’ll clearly do anything at this point – including standing in freezing Canadian water for hours, stripping naked and crawling into a dead horse, and gnawing on live fish.

    Bleak/horrifying images from the film are overlaid with worried comments from film critics, concerned members of the Academy, previous directors like Quentin Tarentino, that guy behind you in the theater and Leo DiCaprio’s anguished mother.

    “Entertainment Weekly says, ‘If we don’t give him an Oscar, his next film is going to be a snuff film or something. I think he’s – he’s gonna hurt himself.’”

    Please, entertainment gods, make the madness stop.